Mail Order Memories
When I was a kid, I was a baseball nerd. I played ball all year long, went to dozens of Mariners games, watched Baseball Tonight religiously, knew every player in the bigs (seriously), and collected...
View ArticleSeattle Sportsnet Presents…Five Rules To Social Media
Because it’s not whether you win or lose. It’s how you play the game. Rule No. 1: If you cannot properly distinguish a joke from a more serious matter, there is no reason you should have Facebook,...
View ArticleA Divine Intervention
I was rolling down Interstate 405 the other day when I came upon a crappy sedan plodding along the highway at about 50 miles per hour. Forced to spend a miserable ten seconds or so behind the Casey...
View ArticleThe Reality of Fantasy
“4 those sincerely concerned, I’m doing ok & plan 2 B back by opening day. 4 those worried abt your fantasy team, u ppl are sick” -Arian Foster (via Twitter, @ArianFoster) Fantasy football is like...
View ArticleA Dissertation on Stadium Trough Etiquette
It started with a simple thought when I was in the bathroom. I’ve found that most simple thoughts originate there. The bathroom has never inspired great debate, analytical dissemination, or even...
View ArticleThe Unfathomable Ineptitude of Your Common Official
I hate refs. Hate them. I have never felt more passionate disdain for a certain species — and refs are arguably the lowest species on the face of the earth, just below amoebas — than that of which I...
View ArticleWhat Are You Proud Of?
Inspiration comes in all shapes and sizes. Today, it just happened to come from my job. Weird, I know. One week ago, my boss asked everyone in our company to come up with three things we do well at...
View ArticleThe Transcendence of a Life
When I was a kid, my parents had an Apple IIE computer that I messed with every day. Black screen with green tube graphics. It was goofy, to say the least. Between games of Swashbuckler, Word Munchers,...
View ArticleThe Perfect Bust
Life is imperfect. In every way, shape, and form, there is nothing ideal about what we do every day. We make mistakes, we err, we’re judged by our flaws, and we overcome adversity that serves to remind...
View ArticleAll The Reasons No One Cares About The NBA Lockout
The NBA is in the middle of a lockout and you don’t care. No one can blame you for that. In fact, I’d like to go ahead and reinforce your decision to remain apathetic. Why don’t we care about the...
View ArticleThe Ruling on the Field is Confirmed: Pac-12 Officials Suck
It’s almost not fair. Why should we have to make concessions for them? They are the ones who suck. They are the incompetent ne’er-do-wells who can’t do their jobs. They are the malcontents who draw our...
View ArticleThe State of the Mission
I was standing outside CenturyLink field on Saturday with three of my closest friends (Matt, Mikey, and Jen, all of whom I’ve really only “known” known for the past year-and-a-half) at a tailgate...
View ArticleBecause It’s Christmas
When I was in middle school, I suffered the misfortune of enduring a horizontal growth spurt, rather than a vertical one. My grandma called it “a phase,” which was fairly accurate, except the “phase”...
View ArticleTwitter: Our Drug of Choice
I love Twitter. Which is also why I hate it so much. It’s like cocaine for media whores. Every time you think you can go a day, an hour, a minute without it, you start scratching your neck funny and...
View ArticleThe Stupidity of Recruiting
Recruiting in college athletics is stupid. It brings out the worst in everybody. It exposes coaches as slimeballs, fans as batshit crazy whiners, and the high school prey as immature, entitled punks. A...
View ArticleAn Ode to the Emasculated
I’ve seen you before. Once upon a time, in a previous life, I was that guy working a middling retail job on the weekends. I was the 21-year-old in a suit standing with my hands clasped at the waist...
View ArticleThe Changing Narrative of A Loathed, Loved, and Enabled Steve Sarkisian
A disease. A medical condition. A weakness. A flaw. An addiction. Alcoholism is labeled in a number of different ways, which might be why it’s so hard for us to determine how we feel about it. It makes...
View ArticleSix Radical Ways Baseball Can Be Improved Right Now
Baseball has spent much of the past decade looking for ways to speed up games, increase attendance, and attract a younger viewership. They’ve implemented changes like limiting mound visits, installing...
View ArticleA Divine Intervention
I was rolling down Interstate 405 the other day when I came upon a crappy sedan plodding along the highway at about 50 miles per hour. Forced to spend a miserable ten seconds or so behind the Casey...
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